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Opinions from the Male Panel

The Male Panel tells us what they THINK women want and when your interest may be taken as a little bit stalkerish!

Question 1: You guys are obviously experienced when it comes to women - what do you think women REALLY want?

Joe: They want someone who will ALWAYS make them happy, shower them with gifts, take them to their favourite places, cook them lovely dinners, be tender when they need it, firm when they crave it, kiss and hug them unexpectedly, never yell, never be boring. This guy exists. On Mars. Go there to find him.

Shaun: If I knew that would I be writing under a pseudonym for fear of my significant other finding out? If I were to venture a guess I’d say listening, empathizing and some other crap.

Peter: Many years ago, I read about a British army officer in Ulster during the Troubles, who said “The Irish don’t know what they want, and they won’t be happy until they get it.” It’s a brilliant bit of logic that perfectly sums up what women want. Of course not all women do this consciously – you know, as a strategy to keep men guessing and confused. Women have a default mode, which is Demand The Opposite Of What He Suggests.

Question 2: When does being strongly interested in a guy become stalking (according to him)?

Joe: When he tells you to piss off and all you're happy about was that he spoke to you. If you make a few moves and you get nothing positive in return, he is not interested. I haven't had a stalker yet. Come find me. I'm not on Mars.

Shaun: I’d say when she starts socializing with your friends, mother and manages to get invited into your circle by someone other than you, she’s a stalker. For guys, frequency of communication is akin to stalking. You could possibly hide in his garden once a week and he wouldn’t mind, but try calling him four times a day and he’ll consider a restraining order.

Peter: How many men complain about stalkers? No, seriously. The problem is that boys are simple creatures. Like dogs, we just want food and love. So we like the direct approach. If you fancy me, just tell me. Don’t play games, FFS. If I don’t fancy you back, accept and respect my response for its honesty and lack of emotional game-playing. And then piss off, because after this you’re stalking.

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