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Male Panel - How to Find Love and Keep the Spark Alive

Whether you want to know how to find someone (decent) to hook your friend up with or need suggestions on how to keep the spark alive in your marriage, my Male Panel has the answers!

Question 1: What is the best way to find a male companion for a single friend? She is a total introvert and does not do well in crowds. I don't think that she would ever join a single's group or join an online dating service. Please help!   

Steve: Being an introvert myself I’ve always found booze to be a great way to help me meet people. I say “meet” people. I mean force conversation upon other similarly hammered people. The only way you’ll ever meet people is to open yourself up to situations where it could happen. Join a sports club or a wine club. Take up a hobby and find forums where you’ll be able to meet like-minded enthusiasts. Accept more invites to meet friend/family for Friday afternoon drinks. Or join a swingers club.

Peter: She sounds like a real peach! Maybe start her off slowly, with a nice lifesize Teddy called Ted, which she can take with her wherever she goes? (That’s if she ever goes anywhere requiring human interaction, eg the shops, bank, library...) No, seriously, this is a ridiculous question. This woman is beyond my help. Beyond your help, too. May I suggest you sneakily drop her off on the front doorstep of The Sisters of The Ultimate Merciful Redemption with a note round her neck saying “We’re returning Sister Invaginata* to your loving care.” * Oh please. Look it up!

Joe: Be the matchmaker. Find a suitable guy, invite him over for dinner, invite her as well. Invite 3 or 4 other people as well. Then just see what happens over the next few days. If nothing, then ask him what he thought, and ask her... get involved. There's nothing wrong. There's also nothing wrong with spinning the truth a bit! 

Question 2: My husband and I lead very busy lives - it is so hard for us to find time for each other in amongst our work/ family/ friends and children commitments ... Any advice on how we can keep the romance alive?

Steve: Spend time away from work/family/friends/children. Or join a swingers club.

Peter: Oh yes, this is an easy one. A) Move to a seaside town where you don’t know anyone. B) Send your brats to boarding school. C) Become beach-combers. Piece of cake. Lots of time for wild sex in the sand dunes. Hell, I should have been an agony aunt, this stuff is FUN!

Joe: Stop watching TV till so late. Go to bed soon after you put the kids to bed. Spend time in the bedroom, even if just to "chill" together. It might be a good idea to get a nice (age restricted!) movie to watch together. The movie "just happens to have some naughty bits" ... who knew?

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