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Best Parenting Tweets of Last Week

My GFA (Good Friend Allison) put me onto this weekly list and I have to say that it is one of my favourite things on the Internet right now. (Let's just say that if you think the most hilarious things pop out of kids' mouths, they have NOTHING on their parents who post some absolute pearlers on Twitter!)

My current favourite HAS to be this one!

 Lurk @ Home Mom @LurkAtHomeMom

Hell hath no fury like a 4 year old whose sandwich has been cut into squares when he wanted triangles.

OK, get your shoes on, we're leaving now! -Me, 2 days before we have to leave the house.

"Ok kids. Whoever doesn't go grocery shopping with Daddy will have to help me clean." And THAT'S how you get the house to yourself.

5yo: "Mom, will you get me a yogurt?"

Me: "You're closer to the fridge."

5yo: *moves to the other side of the room*

"Now you're closer."

According to life lessons about adulthood I've been teaching my kids, when they're older they can spend as much as they want on iced coffee.

Everything I chronically nag my kids about can basically be boiled down to "Don't be such a shitty roommate."

 Misstlovestrinkets @mstluvstrinkets

When I say I'm going on vacation with my kids just know I'm using the word "vacation" loosely.

Me: Just be quiet for 5 minutes.

4-year-old: OK.

Me:

4: Daddy

Me:

4: Daddy!

Me:

4: DADDY!

Me: WHAT?

4: Look how quiet I’m being!

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